Shy Bladder syndrome – formally known as Paruresis – is an inability to pee when in the presence of other people. But have you ever wondered why this happens? The fact is that – a person with this condition would find it very difficult to pee in public urinals! The key to the problem actually lies in understanding the triggers that set off this reaction.
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The reaction is that the muscles that control the act of urinating clench, when in the presence of other people. It is only when these muscles are relaxed that you can urinate without difficulty – but when your body unconsciously clenches them – it leads to shy bladder syndrome – and even when such people try, they are not able to make the muscles relax.
But, the question is –there’s no physiological cause for this clenching, so what causes it? The causes are actually more triggers – psychological ones that translate to this physical manifestation in your body.
Understanding the triggers
When you are made familiarized with these triggers, you can actually try and work your way around them. This is because, since pee phobia is a psychological social phobia – when you understand the triggers you can actually start changing your mindset and making a move towards getting over the condition.
Chiefly, there are three triggers we will discuss:
This condition usually triggers if there is the presence of strangers in the toilet. In a lot of cases, having close family, or friends or even a partner does not trigger the same reaction. Therefore familiarity is what your brain craves – and your body finds it difficult to ‘do its business’ when there’s no familiarity with the people around. It may be caused by shyness, or the fear of getting ridiculed. But whatever the cause – getting over this feeling of avoiding peeing with strangers around can help.
State of Mind
Once the Paruresis has been triggered, it can actually trigger anger, anxiety or shame. As you know, all these states of mind only serve to make the muscles tenser. Chances are the person will not be able to urinate at all after this till the trigger is removed.
Therefore, the thing to understand here is, you need to get over this tensing. Usually during therapy for Paruresis – or during Paruresis treatment – usually the therapist or doctor will advise you to relax and take deep breaths – so that you can slowly achieve the relaxation required.
This is the third trigger. How close the urinals are to each other, how close the person in the next urinal/cubicle is – both these things can become triggers. Again, this is closely linked to privacy. It could make them feel like others can hear them or see them at it – and this just triggers the fear of being judged. In the case of most men – shifting from open urinals to closed cubicles can make the situation significantly better.
So, the next time you find yourself unable to go to the toilet – stop and consider. Understanding the triggers can be what you need to get over the shyness and be able to socialize freely!
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